like a junky needs junk

O ye gods why do I watch Bravo (aka the network for the wealthy, gay or both)?? Because it's Awesome that's why. Last night's Top Chef reunion show? Made me feel Icky, but in all the good, trashy ways. Someone else could maybe explain this to me: on every reality show EVAR there is someone who looks into the camera and says "I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to win." This is supposed to excuse the various atrocities they commit over the course of 8-12 episodes. Yet when the reunion show (a weird new tradition in reality television where everyone gets together to drink and look at clips) rolls around, they (in this case, Tiffani Faison) are surprised when nobody wants to be their friend! You said you didn't want friends. Now you discover that $100,000 is not enough money to "be somebody's monkey"?? Gawd sometimes I want to get on reality tv and rub this crap in people's faces. Man, you're STILL gonna get rich if you get on tv--these days even the first person kicked off a show gets at least one offer from an agent and subsequent appearances in stuff. It's like reality tv is an automatic doubler of your guaranteed 15 minutes. You're still gonna get rich, you might as well have a good time and be nice to some people along the way. Winning is awesome, I'm sure, but it is actually not ever necessary to say that you're not there to make friends. Everybody wants to win, you ninnehammers! I think it would still be Great Television to see some dude trying to make friends and succeeding, then also winning a pile of cash. Would one of my friends (all of whom are universally excellent and nice people) with more free time please audition for one of these shows?

I bet star5 would do well at Project Runway. dangerdhotrod belongs on Unanimous (as the winner of course). mrs_lovett... hm... not wife swap, please! but I bet she'd kill on Colonial House. If they ever re-do The Law Firm, I'd say r0ckc4ndy would work on that. unclebastard has clearly already won Beauty and the Geek, though with the bird thing, none of us is sure which one's the beauty and which the geek*. And of course, lio? Survivor; geez I mean would that not be perfect? does that surprise anyone? Would you not pay to see that?

Oh hey! There you go: your meme for the day: pick five friends from your list and declare the reality tv show upon which they should compete. Post results in your lj. Each of them have to do it with five of their own.


*rimshot!